Aaron

This post is part of the A to Z Challenge. This year, I’ll be writing about people, places and events that I encountered and experienced when I left home for the first time to live in a residential college for two years. I was 18. I’ve a book in the works about those significant and tumultuous two years but I’ve still got a long way to go. I’m hoping dredging up some memories and writing about them during this Challenge will push me further towards the finish line. With that, each post this month will be associated with a letter of the alphabet in this theme. Enjoy!

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I remember driving up towards the college campus. I was in the back seat of my parent’s Pajero, clutching my backpack. I had another suitcase in the trunk of the car. It was mid-morning and I thought I’d be early but there were already many students and their family milling around the academic block, which was where we were supposed to register upon arrival.

As we drove past the academic block, looking for a spot to park in, I noticed a boy in a white dress shirt tucked into black pants. A woman, most likely his mother, was straightening his tie. The boy wore a bored and frustrated look on his face. I smiled to myself.

Later, I learnt the boy’s name was Aaron. He ended up my classmate for the next two years. I also learnt that he liked to tap his feet when he was figuring out problems and that he thought I was a strange creature.

He was my first love.

Reflections from a sort-of A to Z Challenge survivor

I had every intention of completing my posts ahead of time despite the fact that I would be off on a holiday for two weeks in April. However, those intentions turned out to be pipe dreams.

Nevertheless, when I realised that I’d be posting according to my own schedule and not the planned schedule for the challenge, I tried not to panic and reminded myself that this challenge is not meant to add stress to my life.

So, I plodded on, and was happy (and not anxious) at posting some letters many days later. One of my motivations to keep going was that I really liked my theme this year – Malaysiana! I was happy to write about the culture, food and other interesting facts about the country I live in. It was equally awesome to read the comments!

So, post A to Z, I want to catch up on blogs that I’ve missed from the folks that did this year’s challenge! Also, I’ve been toying with the idea of perhaps doing a post focused on Malaysiana perhaps once a week so we’ll see how that pans out!

Congkak

This post is part of the A to Z Challenge. Each post will be associated with a letter of the alphabet with the theme ‘Malaysiana‘

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I grew up during a time when as kids, we entertained ourselves by playing games like congkak (chong-kuck). What the heck is congkak? Well, it’s a two-person logic game played using  a papan congkak or congkak board.

A congkak board filled with marbles. 

I used to play congkak during free periods in primary school. The congkak boards were usually kept in the library and we’d sign it out and bring it back to our classrooms.

This is not unique to Malaysia though as Indonesia, Singapore and even the Philippines have their version of it.

In a congkak board, the smaller holes in the middle are called the “houses” while the two larger ones on each end are the “storehouses”. Each player sits on one side of the board and the houses facing them as well as the storehouse to their left belong to that player and vice versa. The game starts by filling each house with marbles or pebbles, the number of which corresponds to how many houses there are on the board. In this case, since there are 7 houses, you’ll need 7 marbles per house so you’ll start with a total of 49 marbles per player. The ultimate objective is to collect the most marbles (or all of them) in your storehouse! This website explains the rules far better than I do 🙂 I also came across this extremely simplified instruction manual –

Source: Happy City Penang Project

Instead of using marbles or pebbles in congkak, you could also use cowrie shells or saga seeds to fill the houses. My preference was always for saga seeds, though they weren’t easy to obtain.

Saga seeds

Caesalpinia seeds

Rubber tree seeds

Cowrie shells

It’s been years since I’ve seen anyone, especially kids play congkak. Though I’m sure if someone’s created a congkak app, they’ll probably play it. Oh, I just googled it, apparently there’s already a congkak app.

Tell me about the childhood games you played!

Guidelines for the New Year

To do/ learn/ experience 40 new things aka project #40thingsat40

To define success on my own terms and not anyone else’s.

To allow myself to move to the next chapter in life when the time comes and to not remain stuck on the same page.

To remind myself that we must take adventures in order to know where we truly belong. 

Write.

Pre-‘Guidelines for the New Year’ Post

Every year, I write a Guidelines for the New Year post. Not on this blog but on my other blog where I’ve been posting more regularly for the last 12 years. This year however, I’ll be posting my Guidelines post here.

While I was happily writing that post, I suddenly realised that I had forgotten what my own Guidelines were this year! Not only that – I’d also realised that in all the years writing my Guidelines post I’d failed to reflect on whether or not I’d lived that year according to the Guidelines I’d painstakingly set out! I was appalled at myself. Appalled! Nevertheless, this pre-‘Guidelines for the New Year’ post is where I’ll rectify that humongous oversight.

This is where you can find this year’s Guidelines.

So, this year, I reminded myself to say yes, which I think I’ve done a pretty good job of abiding to. One of the things I’ve said yes to, which at other times in my life, I would have said nuh-uh, was agreeing to freelance work (while holding down a 9-to-5 job).

The guideline to be mindful every moment of the things I say, do and feel was a reminder to be present in and appreciate each moment and I don’t think I did that as well as I could have. I also didn’t practice gratitude as often as I should when truthfully, there’s a lot that I’m grateful for.

I’m positive my 9 day trip to London and Paris in early-December qualifies as my one grand adventure for the year! (More on this later)

To learn at least one new thing. Does learning to not detest escargot count? 😉

And finally, the guideline to remember and to remind myself that this is my life to do with what I wish which means I can keep it this way, or change it to how it deserves to be, is why I’m at another crossroad in my life and will be making a leap in January 2017. Joyfear.

So, reflecting on 2016, I have to admit that for me, professionally, there were more downs than ups and the ups were mainly from the freelance work I said yes to. On the other hand, personally, it’s been a fairly memorable year – new friends, the grand adventure – which makes me a little eager to see what 2017 will bring. Just a little eager because, you know, joyfear. Also, I’m looking forward to more blogging next year. Much, much more since I already have several themed posts up my sleeve 😀

So, before I end my pre-Guidelines to the New Year post and also because this post recommends I “prompt my readers (yes, I’m looking at the both of you) for their thoughts when I’ve finished my roundup, tell me – which of my posts this year that you’ve read made you go “This woman is awesome! I want her to be my BFF!”?

May next year be half as sweet as these candied apples at the Christmas Market, Champs-Elysees

Observing Friends/ Parents

I was at a gathering of old school mates the past weekend.

There were 9 adults.

And 9 kids, ranging from toddler to 7 or 8 years old.

To describe the scene as fairly chaotic would be an understatement.

The amazing thing for me being there was that I had the rare opportunity to observe my old friends, not as my old friends, but in their role as parents. This was enlightening to me because among the group was an old classmate I never got close to and never would’ve imagined ending up as a doting father of two girls. Yet there he was, sitting in the armchair in one corner of the room, his girls running around him and not a raised voice heard from him. They were his princesses. This was the guy who was well known in our class for his short temper and would frequently get into arguments at the drop of a hat. Huh.

There was also the ex-class clown who passed on his silliness to his firstborn and to see him interacting with his son as if his son was such a wondrous gift from Heaven…well…there were moments that I had to blink furiously to dispel the tears that hovered at the corner of my eyes.

Then there was the girl who was my partner in crime with whom I’d get into tonnes of mischief with, who is now a mother of three. I think watching her with her children was most fascinating. She retained that youthfulness and playfulness about her even when she was reprimanding her kids for running around on a full stomach. And her little boy…oh, I almost brought him home with me.

Then of course there were the high school sweethearts – whenever they speak about their kids, I get wistful. Their kids were so energised, I got tired just watching them but it was their youngest girl that held me and I imagined her future when she’d realise she has such wonderful older brothers to protect her as she navigates life and I thought what a lucky little lady.

I drove home that day with so many thoughts in my head and a smile in my heart, grateful to bear witness to old friends who are an amazing group of parents with their equally amazing bundles of joy.

Originally posted on the 19th of August, 2013 at Stories from Sonobe

That’s What Friends are For

I pressed `PLAY’ on the VCR, leaned back against the sofa and got ready to watch the tape.

The opening credits began – Memories of Redang…1st to 5th July 1997. For the next 140 minutes, I was transfixed, watching someone else’s version of my memory.

Dhalita, who came up with the idea to record our entire mini-break, came onscreen and said, “Say something lah, in 50 years when I watch this video, I want to know what we did today!”

Cheese, the self-appointed leader of our motley crew, obediently began to narrate the mundane, “This morning, we woke up, brushed our teeth, had breakfast…”.

I giggled. I’d forgotten he could be funny.

As I watched the video, I alternated between smiling, laughing, going “Haiyoh!” and slapped my forehead with the palm of my hand. Definitely not the reaction I was expecting from myself. I was almost enjoying reliving the events that happened on the trip so long ago. Every single time the faces of the people I used to love came onscreen, I expected my heart to contract a little, but it didn’t. Instead, I watched their young selves and smiled at the memory of the people they were, the people I knew.

I didn’t even remember that we had a thank you-gift giving ceremony for Leen who’d single-handedly organised the entire trip for all of us. But there we were on the screen and Leen had just accepted our gift of a super-comfortable pillow that she hugged the whole bus ride back. “Say something lah,” we urged. “Thank you,” she said into the camera. “I shy” and she hid her face with her brand new pillow. Typical Leen.

I surprised myself.

For all of 138 minutes, I didn’t shed one tear.

Then the montage came on in the 139th minute and Dionne Warwick’s `That’s What Friends Are For’ played in the background. As she reached the lyrics…

And if I should ever go away
Well, then close your eyes and try to feel
The way we do today
And then if you can remember

Keep smilin’, keep shinin’
Knowin’ you can always count on me, for sure
That’s what friends are for
For good times and bad times
I’ll be on your side forever more
That’s what friends are for

…I rested my head on my knee that I had bent to my chest and cried a little.

Not long after that trip, our motley crew drifted apart. I’m no longer on speaking terms with almost all of those people that I went to Redang with and I sometimes lie awake at night and wonder why. Now, whenever this song comes on the radio, I’m transported back to those carefree days and nights on the island and a tiny, tiny part of me wishes that I could be with all of them for all their good times and bad, to be on their side forever more and to show them that that’s what friends are for.

I Survived Another #atozchallenge. Again.

The last time I survived the #atozchallenge was 2014. So, surviving it again this year (after 2015’s less-than-perfect performance) was awesome!

This year, about 10 of my posts were written way ahead of time which in itself is an amazing feat since I normally prefer writing my posts on the day itself.

Some days, I had no idea what to write about and instead of stressing myself out about it, I just let it go (because the challenge is supposed to be fun!), and wrote that post the next day (or the day after that ;P).

I liked the theme I chose this year because it gave me an opportunity to vent to strangers about my work conditions which was of course good for my stress levels.

I loved reading the comments I received and at times wonder if my fellow challengers think that I made up the people/ situations I post about because they seemed alarmed/ surprised/ suspicious. Unfortunately, every post in this challenge is 100% true, including the antics of The Boss and colleagues I wrote about. Yep.

I spent more time this year commenting on fellow challengers’ posts than the previous years I did the challenge. I loved the interaction and stumbling upon new blogs.

I also found several blogs that I will continue to lurk at read 😀 –

• Roamin’ Gnomials – I loved reading about the people in his life and I found his writing to be engaging and humorous. Some of his posts were sad too and even those ones kept me hooked. His comments on my blog made me laugh, sometimes LOL
• That’s What Anxious Mom Said – Throughout the challenge, her posts about textspeak were informative and downright funny! I had to stifle my giggles every time I read them because I’d read posts while at work and I didn’t want my colleagues to ask me what I was doing. In the end, it sounded like I was trying to stifle a cough and they’d ask me “Are you okay?” “Ya.” I’d always reply.
• Herding Cats and Burning Soup – I’m borderline obsessed with Anna’s blog because it has book reviews, pictures of hot men and cats! Her posts about lust were at times NSFW and other times surprising like when she posted her P for Privacy post when I’m sure all her loyal readers were expecting something else LOL
• Stephanie Ingram – Stephanie wrote mostly creepy stories during the challenge but her last post was her “N” post. I loved reading all her stories and there were a few I would only read in the day time. I hope one day, she’ll expand some of the posts she did for the challenge into a full-fledged story. I’d read them.

Looking forward to the next A to Z challenge!

Note: This blog is where I post about my writing, my non-writing writing, writing classes I take, my poems…everything and anything writing-related. I also blog at Stories from Sonobe which is where I post about my life and all the strange/ weird/ funny experiences that encounter me. Do drop by and say hello!