In the Colin R Onstad Room (F2K): Lesson 3 POV

Woo hoo! This is another favourite lesson from F2K (ok, ok…all the lessons are favourites) about writing from different POVs.

From your own writings, pick out a paragraph you like; then tell it from a different POV.

This session, I wanted to try my hand at the 2nd person POV so I used a piece of writing from my WIP which I had written as a stand-alone story about Colin and Angie which I realised could actually be incorporated into my Manang story. I rewrote the original piece and made it tighter and I’m pretty happy for how my 2nd person POV came out.

***

3rd person POV

Colin watched, perplexed, as Jess stood unmoving on the uncovered sidewalk outside her apartment building. Rain pummelled her lithe form and plastered her long, wavy black tresses to the sides of her face and down her back. Mascara stained the flesh beneath her eyes. He called out her name as he moved towards her but she barely twitched. He tried a second time, shouting out “Hey!” This time, she turned and when his eyes met hers, blankness stared back. Colin faltered. He’d seen her shy around him, avert her eyes whenever he spoke to her but he’d never seen her look at him with nothing in her gaze. Chillness filled him and he continued to stalk towards her. Eyes still locked together, she took a tentative step back, fear replaced her vacant stare and she held her hand out as if to ward him away. If he didn’t hurry, he was sure she’d bolt.

2nd person POV

You find yourself outside, in the rain but you can’t remember how you got there. Did you walk along the broken sidewalk which had weeds erupting from the cracks? Or did you come out of the warmly lit building behind you? The uniformed man within its doors is smiling at you. You feel cold seep through your wet garments. You glance down and see you’re wearing a pale yellow dress. You think it’s pretty. Oh yes, you’re in the rain. Somehow, you know that you should look for cover or else you’d catch a cold. Did your mother tell you that? Or did you read about it in a magazine? You try to remember but all you encounter is wool and pain irradiates from deep within your skull. You stop remembering and the pain recedes. You hear a voice shout “Hey!” and you turn. Your eyes meet eyes of light toffee that belongs to a large man who is coming your way. His forehead is creased with worry but you don’t really care. You stare at this person whose right arm is encased in swirling ink and am momentarily hypnotised by the pattern on tanned skin. Your brain shouts at you that he is coming FOR you. Your body goes stiff and your heart starts pounding erratically; fear fills you. Your brain instructs you to step back and RUN!

(WC 383)

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